On one of my first trips to Paris, I received a slave to my apartment and opened the door to him in the corridor with cash in his mouth. Before entering, he fell to his knees and clambered on all fours into my entry. I stood still in shock and horror, a cardboard cut-out image of a displeased domina. I had not requested this, nor would I ever where my neighbors could be disturbed. 

“What, on earth, are you doing?”

“I’m a slave. I know how to be a good slave. I have been trained.”

Well, yes, in a way, but not my way. What followed was an entirely too-long debate about what made a good slave. Someone somewhere had put this idea in his head. Perhaps this worked for whoever had this idea. However, it was certainly not a metanarrative of what a good slave is, not for me nor most.

Okay, what does make a good slave? What are the rules? What is a submissive supposed to do?

Nothing. Do nothing.

I am not kidding. Do nothing. Forget whatever your past mistress told you. Forget whatever you fantasized a mistress would want. And, for the love of all that is good, forget what you saw on PornHub.

Do nothing.

Think nothing.

Be the empty vessel, awaiting instructions.

There, now you are a good slave because you are trainable. All those other thoughts were getting in the way of what the mistress in front of you will tell you. Want to be the best slave? Be a fast learner. Pay attention. It sounds simple, but the simple act of paying attention will get you much farther than spinning your brain and trying to anticipate when you don’t know. How could you? Mistress hasn’t told you yet, and there is an excellent reason you are the slave, and she is the mistress.

Don’t be so hard on yourself. So much vanilla life is about being proactive and building on learned behaviors based on social norms and mores. Remember, you are leaving that world for a world your master or mistress creates. Allow them to create it. That is why you are at that door to the experience in the first place.